All the pieces…

We spend a lot of our lives hoping for a day, a moment when all the disparate influences and troubles we face just melt away and reveal a singular resolution and shining light of clarity. We invest our feelings, our beliefs and our personal livelihoods in the dream of a better life, of a commitment to fairness and goodness being repaid in equal measure by a fair and just world. We wait for that day to come but it never does.

I’m watching the world fall apart – my world, your world, our world – and I don’t see anyone rising above it all to guide us, to protect us from ourselves, to support and love us because we can hardly love ourselves or each other without some recurring experience of unacknowledged yet abject emotional destitution and transactional confusion. Wracked with uncertainty, I continue to exist quite simply for the purpose of continuing to exist; without reason, meaning or any profound art or beauty. It all feels hollow and all the pieces fall apart like some dark entropy into death and melancholy sleep or forgetting and oblivion.

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